This Week In Beauty: I’m Going to Stop Lying to Myself

And here's what I am going to start doing.

It rained this weekend in LA. I am safe, and I can tell you this: everything that’s transpired has reshaped how I see this city and my place in it. To be so close yet so far from the disasters of climate change, suffering, and destruction. To not turn away or recluse when disaster strikes. To figure out ways to uplift your fellow Angeleno. It has shifted me in ways I’ll I won’t shy away from processing. The work we do, the skills we’ve gathered, it all matters in this moment and will continue to in the world to come.

Follow @studio.symone for updates on beauty product donation needs, beauty business owners offering space to other beauty caretakers, and stylists — all while creating programming to serve those who have been impacted by these fires.

Hey so before I explain why it’s finally time to stop lying to myself, I’m excited to share that Studio Symoné has a residency at Sip & Sonder, a Black-owned café and roaster in Inglewood with locations in DTLA and Downtown Disney.

Here, I will bring the Studio Symoné world alive, while challenging myself to fully pursue my creativity in ways I’ve dreamed of for so long.

In addition, I have collaborated with Sip & Sonder to create a limited-time drink: The Symoné Sip. RSVP to attend the launch and be one of the first to try this amazing, tea-based beverage. The intuitive Sarissa Thrower will be in attendance, offering readings for those who are into that! And, you can purchase the first edition of the Studio Symoné newspaper.

I am excited to be out in the real world. Here’s the programming. I hope you join me at Sip & Sonder!

STUDIO HOURS

Weekly work session where folks can come to work, study, dream, conspire, read magazines, and contribute to the second edition of the Studio Symoné newspaper zine, which will focus on telling stories in the Los Angeles beauty communities.

FRIDAYS 10AM - 2PM | every Friday starting 1/24

IN THE LAB/sundown DJ SETS

As part of my residency, I’ll be DJing every other Friday during the later hours. Because of Sip & Sonder’s partnership with The Music Center's Walt Disney Concert Hall, these sets will also play right outside of their location near the hall.

FRIDAYS 3PM - 5PM | every other Friday starting 1/24

BEAUTY ROUNDTABLE

There’s a gap between media and academia. Writers don’t always have access to the journals, studies, and articles academics produce, and academics aren’t usually on the ground, gathering real-time data on beauty and culture like reporters do. This roundtable is about helping bridge that gap—creating a space for scholars, students, culture workers, and writers to come together and have meaningful conversations about beauty.

TBD | in the works

As you can see, I’m doing everything but writing this newsletter. Let’s talk about why.

The past two years, I’ve been working to detach myself from the identity of solely being a beauty reporter, and a writer and a journalist, period.

Allow me tell you a story.

In 2017, when I moved to LA after working at BuzzFeed News, Yahoo, NBC and CBS in NYC, I once reached out to a woman in media who I respected to ask if she’d take a phone call with me. She was doing work in the news curation space, which was something I’d also been doing at another company before deciding to move to LA and start fresh. I was 27 years old, maybe younger. On the call, she said to me, “You know, a lot of people like you but they don’t know what you do.”

At the time, I was a news curation editor at BuzzFeed News, and I had my own podcast, Am I Allowed to Like Anything? People definitely knew what I did, but her words stayed etched in my brain. I took her idea of me as the truth. And because I believed her, I internalized the idea that what I did meant nothing, was nothing, unless I chose a lane. *I could start crying right here, because what a cruel thing to think of one’s self.*

So when I wrote an article for Into The Gloss that sparked my interest in covering beauty, I thought I’d found my answer. I realized I could cover beauty, news, and culture in a way that felt fresh and meaningful. I thought I’d finally found my space. I was relieved. I believed I’d never have to “switch lanes” again, and I’d always have a solid, clear answer to the question, “What do you do?”

“Hi, my name is Darian, and I cover beauty at the intersection of politics and pop culture.”

Great. No questions, no confusion. And the perk? I wouldn’t have to spend time over-explaining myself, because people are going to make assumptions anyway. I told myself I could sit in this lane, thrive in it, find security, and be happy. This was it. Done and done. I could finally take a deep breath.

Looking back, I can tell you that this black media executive’s words planted a fixation on “finding a lane” that impacted how I saw myself and my work for far too long. But that mindset? That’s on me. It’s my responsibility to listen to what people have to say, reflect on it, and decide whether to integrate it or throw it away.

That’s a tough lesson.

Now, I can more confidently say what I think/know, a lot of people have already known about me and have been waiting for me to admit to myself: the concept of a “lane” should not exist in my vocabulary. I am a true multi-hyphenate.

Therefore, a platform only works for me until it doesn’t. Which is why platform-based subscription models don’t set me up for success. Any platform truly committed to creators would build a tool that lets us receive support wherever we choose to show up. But this idea is almost too logical that it’s silly, right? It would mean prioritizing the well-being of creatives over profit. It would stop making creators out of artists. And most people in tech aren’t interested in building tools that spark true freedom. But this kind of autonomy matters in an economy where creators have no control over certain factors, supremely algorithms that shape, define, and impact their livelihoods. So if you ever find yourself believing that tech companies care about creators—yes, there are people working there who do—shake yourself and remember: they do not.

I do my best work when I’m molding and melding my skills to create, serve, and share something new – often times for more than one project at once. I become laser-focused. As I’ve let myself ease back into this mindset – which I banished because I thought doing the most was frowned upon – I’ve been thriving.

I will continue to evolve.

I will not trick myself into believing that I am lazy or that my work lacks value just because I’m not consistently publishing on Substack.

The truth is I’ve shifted where and how I work, create, and make money.

I must create a new system for myself.

No one will do this for me, but one day, I will happily share what I’ve learned.

If you are a Substack subscriber who expected a monthly or weekly beauty news update and would like a refund, just holler. I’m sorry for the back and forth—this is not my proudest moment. I can’t guarantee when or how often I will publish here, but one thing I will say: because of shattering shifts in the media landscape, it was beginning to feel like a reach to curate beauty news, and even eye have been turned off – which I took as a sign.

If you’re interested in supporting Studio Symoné no matter where we should up, you can look into a one time or monthly gift of your choice through the independent platform I hacked together. I would urge you to think of your offering as less of a “gift” or “donation,” but an investment into something you’d like to see grow.

Support goes to:

• The printing of our first newspaper covering beauty in Los Angeles - first issue drops at the drink launch!

• The production of Studio Supply

• Product development

• The ongoing growth of the Studio Symoné ethos, both as a beauty storytelling platform and an IRL experience

If you’ve been a comped subscriber for a while (there are too many of you that I’m embarrassed to say how many but know that I have an undying love for you all), this may be an opportunity to consider going paid!